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Wrong Choices Make Life Harder

Make the right choices now for a better tomorrow.


My name is Berry Deuces. I grew up in a loving environment with my parents, three sisters, and a brother. My siblings and I are close to each other. We share a lot in life. My parents are the most amazing parents anyone could have. As a child, my parents did everything they know to keep us educated and well taught to understand life, physically, religiously, emotionally and financially. My brother who is older than I, is always the humble one. My sisters are cool and chill, they keep to themselves and always humble like my parents. As for me, well you know what they say about a family, that there is always a black sheep in the family no matter how humble and sweet that family is? That's who I am or how I seen myself looking back at all I did in my past. I'm always the one that does things that my parents say, "don't do." We all have the free agency to do and choose what we want to do. My siblings are always obeying my parents and they follow and do what they believe is the right thing to do. Me on the other hand, I always choose the opposite. Not that I do it on purpose, but mainly because I am always so curious of everything in life and I tend to choose and challenge things and make things or life harder for myself mainly by choosing what I thought would be cool and fun.

I grew up to be known as the prodigal son, from a very young age, I always have fun with my friends. I'm the child that runs through the mud or dirty water when my mom told me don't do it. When my friends got on a small cliff and jumped off, I followed them and did the same too. It ended tragically to the point where as I jumped off, my foot landed on something sharp and it nearly cut my foot in half. My dad had to stay with me in the hospital as they did surgery on my foot which needed 44 stitches. Also at this young age, a bully molested me and I never told anyone about it until I became a teenager. I told my mom about it but that's years and years after we moved away from the country we lived in. My mom cried for months knowing the truth and we couldn't do anything about it because I don't know the name of that molester. While in high school, I skipped classes a lot and go with my friends to do drugs and go home when school was over. When my friends wanted to shop lift a Wal-Mart store, I was with them and that's where my whole life went down hill.

My friends and I entered the Wal-Mart store and they start putting beers in the backpacks that they took in. They all said we will walk out and leave the store. So we all walked out, the others with the bags were walking ahead and I saw they were talking to the greeter and then I saw them run out. But the greeter caught one and I ran up to them and reacted by punching the greeter so the one that was caught can run out while I hit the greeter. I saw the greeter come after me as he lost hold of the other guy and I punched the greeter and kicked him as he fell down, I ran for the door and we all ran for the car that was waiting for us. We drove off in a rush and went to one of my friend's home. We partied there for half an hour and suddenly police surrounded the house and was knocking on the doors. They traced us and followed us and we all were taken to jail after that.

Being incarcerated is no fun at all. But I was paying for consequences of my actions and it definitely was not anything I ever experienced. I was always missing my family that I ignored through out the whole time I was out free. Locked up in jail and always hungry, not getting much to eat like I usually do while at home and most of all, being so uncomfortable in an environment where you have no freedom to do anything at all. For the first time in my life, I broke down and cried realizing all that I been through and what I have done to myself. I can't see my family until their visiting days. When they visit me, my mom cries all the time, she can't stand seeing me behind bars and not being able to take me home. I hated myself because my mom never stops crying every chance she comes to visit me. My dad works out of town and when he finally get off work, he rushes to make it on time to visit me so he wont miss visiting me on his days off. When time came for me to go to the court, I look forward to seeing my mom there or my family. But, I always see only my mom or my dad, my siblings were busy with work and school. I got to serve time as ordered by the judge and it was not easy because it felt like a million years being incarcerated, but it was only a few months. When I finished serving my time, I left the jail happily heading home with long hair. I never want to go through that experience ever again.

I was assigned to report to my probation officer and pay for fees I slacked on some and it caused the probation officer to get an order from the court to throw me back into jail. I hated it so much. But I, was still not learning my lesson and was still slacking off on my responsibilities on things I need to do to be fully released from my probation. I came out again only to go back in again because of slacking. I saw that my mom was tired of seeing me going through the same routine over and over. One day, she didn't show up to visit me, but it was only my dad and my siblings. I called home to check on her and she told me she's sick of seeing me where I am. I went through programs to help me get release but one of the requirements was that I need a letter from my mom, describing how my actions and all I been through and put her through has effected her. All my siblings and dad wrote their letters right away except for my mom. It took her about three months to finally be able to write down all her feelings and how everything I been putting her through has effected her emotionally, physically and mentally. When I finally received her letter through the email she sent, I read it in front of all the inmates I was with, and from when I started reading to the end, they all got so emotional and everyone cried hearing the letter my mom wrote me. It was so powerful that it touched everyone in the jail. When I finally fulfill all the requirements needed to be free to go home, I left jail again, happy again to be able to see my family all over again. I was back on probation again, and this time I made sure that I do all I needed to do to be released from the bondage of being on probation. When my probation was close to ending, my P.O. told me and I was excited for it.

I maintained a good job and the people that I work for are such amazing people, they truly love and care for me, even with all my criminal record, they took me in like one of their own. One day while resting after work, my P.O. called and told me my probation is over. I felt so much relief and so much joy, just knowing that I'm finally free to be able to enjoy life like a normal good person should, it felt heavenly to me. I was happy but my mother was thrilled and so were my siblings and my dad. My extended family were all so supportive of me through out all my trials and it wasn't easy being me or being one of my family members. They always got my back all the time and I thank God for such wonderful people he blessed me with. I know that I learned things the hard way and I definitely made it harder for my loved ones too. I'm a much wiser person now and I am still learning everything I need to daily and living life more happily and properly as I always should. I thank God for not forsaking me when I wasn't performing as the son he wants me to be. He endlessly loves me unconditionally and blesses me daily with good health, families, friends, and love for each other that we always have but sometimes are blind to see what we are blessed with.

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